Some printing companies are pretty lousy at self promotion, especially when you look at their web sites. Here is a short tutorial on how to screw up your web site:
- Force all visitors to first watch a Flash intro movie which cannot be skipped. To avoid any confusion about what you are really all about, make sure the video contains long shots of paper moving through presses. Visitors can never get enough of this!
- There must be some cyan, magenta, yellow and black circles, squares or lines spread all over the site. They prove that you know what you are talking about!
- Publish an exhaustive list of all the equipment you have, right down to the exact model number of each press. You cannot imagine how many companies would still be around today if their customers had only realized their jobs were printed on a 5-color Heidelberg Speedmaster CD74.
- The ‘About’ page should be dedicated to the long history of your company. Pay special attention to an elaborate description on how successful your great grandfather was in growing the business. Prospects will be reassured when they read how good the customer service was around 1905.
- Add a ‘Customer portal’ link but make sure it is password protected with no clue whatsoever how to get access to that portal or what it is for. This adds an element of suspense that is sure to lure new customers in droves.
- Of course your company is eco friendly, carbon neutral, sustainable and certified by at least 15 important sounding organizations. You practically have to chase the squirrels away from the ink fountains each Monday morning.
- A typo or two assure prospects that you are not infalible. They will instinctively understand that you will go the extra mile and reprint any job, even if they signed off proofs.
9 August 2013